


Glowing

by 852_Prospect_Archivist



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Episode Related, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 06:30:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/794915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/852_Prospect_Archivist/pseuds/852_Prospect_Archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Faced with having nearly lost Blair, Jim is forced to consider the feelings he's been denying for his friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Glowing

DISCLAIMER: Pet Fly Productions owns the rights to everything, except Dr. Beard. He's mine. I'm just letting the boys blow off a little steam, since they had a really bad day with this Golden stuff. 

WARNING: NC-17 stuff abounds. Graphic descriptions of m/m sex. If you're under 18, don't read. If you don't like the idea of Jim and Blair having a loving, consensual, sexual relationship, then why are you here? 

Note: I started this story after I watched BMB for the umpteen- thousandth time over the weekend. (Then I read Cybel's story, and very nearly scrapped the whole project... (g)) I just couldn't get out of my head the thought that the boys seemed to be saying more than we were hearing. I thought maybe they'd like the chance to be heard. :D Feel free to pass around, or whatever, just keep the headers attached. Comments/criticism is warmly welcomed and appreciated. To Michelle: Please archive this. 

Synopsis: Faced with having nearly lost Blair, Jim is forced to consider the feelings he's been denying for his friend. 

## Glowing

(The *real* ending to BMB)  
by Kim Gasper  
Copyright 2/97

An indeterminate noise startled Jim into full awareness. He'd really only been dozing; tired, but too concerned about Blair to settle in comfortably. The figure in the bed next to him coughed. That was it then--the noise that had disturbed him. Was he going to wake up soon? It'd been almost 12 hours since they'd brought him to the hospital. Jim leaned over the bed, trying to judge Blair's state with his other senses. His eyesight was coming back--when he concentrated he could make out objects now--but it wasn't reliable yet. 

"Chief?" No response. Damn. When was he going to wake up? He needed to know, to hear Blair's voice...see with his own eyes that his partner was going to be all right. Jim sighed and sank back into the chair that he'd pulled next to the bed. He hadn't really expected a response, but one would be nice. He stretched his arm out, and gently smoothed hair off Blair's forehead, stroking softly. Poor kid had gotten a full dose and then some of that vicious drug known as Golden. *At least we got the bastards.* No one else would have to worry about it.   
  


The world had a strange, albeit comforting, glow to it. Weird...where was that coming from? Where was *he*, for that matter. And who was stroking his forehead? Blair struggled to open his eyes all the way, to push up from the bed. He made a soft choking noise, and suddenly Jim was there, leaning over him. 

"It's okay, Chief. You're in the hospital." At his words Blair tried to speak, but only rough gagging noises came out. "Hang on, buddy. You've got a tube down your throat. Let me find the doctor." 

Jim disappeared and returned only a minute later, the promised doctor in tow. 

"Mr. Sandburg...nice to see you among the living again." Blair's eyes flashed up to read the nametag--Beard. Dr. Beard. "Now hang on, son...we have to get the tube out of your throat. Open as wide as you can."   
  


Blair was okay. Jim sighed with relief as he watched the doctor working over him, removing the tubes and apparatus that had been necessary to monitor him while the drug worked through his system. He paced the back of the room until Dr. Beard turned to him and told him that he was finished. The doctor left the room then, pulling the door closed behind him. 

"Hey...how you feeling?" Jim pulled his chair up closer to the bed. Blair was laying there, strangely silent. 

"We--" He stopped, and cleared his throat. "Weird." The word came out this time, as a croak. Jim reached to the table beside him for the glass of water he'd set there earlier. 

"Here--try this." He handed the water to Blair, and felt a surge of emotion race through him when their fingers touched. 

"Thanks." Blair gulped the water down, then handed the glass back to Jim. When he spoke again his voice was still raspy, but working. "What happened?" 

"What do you remember?" 

Ah, the Million Dollar Question. "Pizza. I remember pizza...and a...gun? I was firing a gun, wasn't I? Jim, what happened?" 

"The pizzas sent into the office were laced with Golden, Chief. You got a mega-dose, and freaked out. You kept talking about seeing 'golden fire people', and having to kill them." 

"I was firing at people?" Jim could hear the emotion in Blair's voice. His guide was no slouch in the self-defense department, but loathed violence in general. 

"Sandburg, you were whacked out on Golden. No one blames you for anything..." 

"Jesus! Did I hurt anyone?" 

"Just a bunch of the department's vehicles. No big deal." 

"Yeah, right. They'll take it out of my paycheck." Blair settled back onto the bed, tension easing somewhat when he realized he hadn't hurt anyone. 

"You don't get a paycheck." 

"Okay, so they take it out of yours. Joke, man. How're your eyes?" 

"My vision's returning slowly. It's not totally reliable yet--but I can see." 

"Good." Blair closed his eyes. He was so tired! 

"That's the stuff they gave you to help counter the Golden." 

"Huh?" 

"That's what's making you sleepy. Take a nap, Chief." Without even thinking about what he was doing, Jim reached out and grasped Blair's hand, and squeezed it. "I'm glad you're back with us, partner." 

"Me too, Jim. Me, too." 

"I'm going to go give Simon a call, tell him you're awake." 

"When do I get to get out of here?" 

"Whenever the doctor says you can." 

"Ask him, would you? I *really* don't like hospitals, Jim. If I don't need medical attention, I can rest just as well at home." 

"Gotcha. See you in a bit." 

"Yeah." 

Blair watched Jim leave the room, then closed his eyes again. Had he been dreaming, or had Jim been stroking his hair and forehead? Nah, had to be a dream. No *way* did Jim feel that way for him. *And what way is that?* questioned that obnoxious little voice in his head. *Romantic, sexual feelings? Right, Sandburg. Get a grip.* Blair sighed. He could always dream, couldn't he?   
  


* * *

  


Jim wandered down the hall toward the nurses station. He could have easily called Simon from Blair's room on his cell phone, but now that Sandburg was awake he needed some respite. What was going on with him? He'd never in his life felt such an overwhelming sense of relief as he'd felt when Blair opened his eyes. *Guy's just a friend.* But he'd come to mean so much more than that--he'd turned into the partner Jim had sworn he'd never have again after Pendergrast had been killed. He was also the only person who could help Jim with these Sentinel abilities...but it was more than that. Much more. He'd had to fight to resist the urge to pull Blair into his arms and just hold him, beg him to wake up. He'd never, *ever* been as scared as he'd been when Blair had collapsed into his arms after the "showdown" in the department garage... tripped out on a rogue street drug, with an indeterminate amount in his system... He shook his head. Whatever it was causing these feelings, it was unsettling. He'd have to think about it some more.   
  


* * *

  


"I want you two to rest. I'm not giving you the next couple of days off to have you gallivanting around Cascade." Simon stood just inside the loft, continuing the lecture he'd begun several hours before when he arrived at the hospital, to take Jim and Blair home. 

"Right, Simon." 

"Jim, I'm serious about this." 

"I am too. We're planning on it. Hey, Sandburg's already asleep." 

"Then he has more sense than you do." 

"You're the one keeping me here talking, Sir." Jim grinned at his Captain--Simon was too much fun not to tweak once in a while. 

"Ha Ha. I'm out of here. Rest, Ellison." 

"Gotcha, Captain." Jim closed the door behind him, and laid down on the couch. It was nice to be home. It was nice to know that Blair was home, resting...safe. He felt another surge of protectiveness toward his young friend, and shifted restlessly. It wasn't just protectiveness he was feeling... And he wasn't sure he wanted to closely examine just *what* exactly it was, yet. He closed his eyes ...and the phone rang. "Damn." He shifted to get up, and heard Blair already out of bed. 

"I got it, Jim." Blair's voice rang to him. 

"I thought you were asleep!" Jim called out as he sank back onto the couch and closed his eyes again. He felt himself drifting off, lulled by the sound of Blair's voice...   
  


"Hey, man. How're your eyes doin'?" 

Jim opened the organs in question to see Blair standing behind the couch, staring down at him. "Almost clear...I just have this, you know, residual kind of fringe glow--" 

"--glow to it, yeah." Blair grinned at him. 

Jim felt himself smiling back. "It's kind of nice, actually." They stayed that way for a minute, exchanging goofy smiles, until someone knocked at the door. 

"Ah, that'd be Margaret." Blair headed for the door. Jim jumped of the couch--leapt, almost, and headed him off. 

"What is she doing here?" He whispered frantically. 

"Well, you know...I realized, it's crazy for me to try and keep you guys apart--so I'm giving you my blessing." Blair pushed past Jim, intent on answering the door. 

"Ah...wait, wait, wait, wait..." Jim put himself between Blair and the door again. 

"What's the matter? You afraid her inner beauty just isn't going to be enough for you, Jim?" 

"Come on...I mean, I lied to her...I deceived her." Jim could hear the panic in his voice--why couldn't Blair? 

"So make it up to her." Blair's hand was on the door-knob. 

"Tell me honestly...how unattractive is she? No, forget it...forget it. I don't care. Should I?" 

"No, you shouldn't." Blair began turning the knob. "Ready?" He made a show of inhaling and exhaling several times, then pulled the door open. After a quick greeting to Margaret, he pushed past her and headed down the hallway. Jim watched him go, not sure what he was feeling at that moment; fairly certain though that it wasn't Margaret he wanted to be spending time with. 

"Hi." He smiled at her, thinking she looked nice with the golden glow he saw surrounding her. 

"Hi." She smiled back, an inviting look in her eyes. 

"Come on in." He gestured for her to come in, and closed the door. 

"Thanks." 

"Margaret--we have to talk."   
  


* * *

  


*Really great, Sandburg.* Blair's brain wouldn't give it a rest. *If you want him for yourself, why are you setting him up with a friend?* Blair heaved a sigh and sat down on the park bench. The sky--which would have been pretty anyway--was beautiful with that residual glow he was seeing. The same residual glow that had framed Jim's face... Why *was* he setting them up? Because Jim was 100% a straight man...wouldn't be interested in a guy, much less him. They were good friends, but just friends. Well, maybe not *just* friends--they'd developed a good working relationship...and a rapport that went beyond friendship. *Probably has to do with the Sentinel/Guide relationship. But that doesn't mean he loves me...never mind wanting to sleep with me.* Blair stared at the sky, seeing things in the clouds he'd never seen before. He could remember some of his drug-induced hallucinations. He hadn't told Jim, didn't want him to worry. But he remembered the fire people-- burned, charred things that should have been dead...but weren't. Blair shuddered, and got up. He walked around the park for a while, enjoying the way things looked different with "the glow", as he was coming to think of it, then decided to head home. He'd been gone for a couple of hours...if Jim wanted to spend more time with Margaret, they could go somewhere else. It was his turn to stay home--he was the one after all who'd just gotten out of the hospital.   
  


* * *

  


He let himself into the loft quietly, pausing by the door to listen for any clues that would tell him if anyone was there. It was silent in the large main room, and the setting sun cast shadows on the walls. Blair shrugged his jacket off and hung it beside the door. He'd just headed into the kitchen when a sleepy voice called down from Jim's room, "Chief? That you?" 

"You expecting someone else?" Blair smiled grimly. Great-- he'd interrupted an intimate moment. 

"No. Hang on, I'll be right down." 

"No, that's all right--" Shaking his head over the useless protest, Blair grabbed two beers out of the fridge and headed for the living area. Jim came downstairs, bare-chested, wearing only worn jeans. Like he'd dressed in a hurry. Shit.... He really hoped he hadn't interrupted anything... "Where's Margaret?" 

"Oh, she went home about an hour ago. I kept waiting for you to show up...but you didn't. I was starting to worry." Jim sat down on the couch, and leaned back. 

"I went for a walk. Here." He handed one of the bottles to Jim, then settled himself on the couch next to him. "Why were you worried?" 

"Well, it was stupid...you shouldn't have gone out, Chief. You just got out of the hospital." Jim reached across the empty cushion and lightly touched his arm. "I shouldn't have let you go." 

"Yeah, but I feel okay, man. It was okay." Blair tried to ignore the sizzle that bounced off every nerve ending in his body at that touch. 

"No, it wasn't." 

"So, how'd you do with Margaret?" That's it...change the subject, act like you care...like you're really interested... 

"We talked." 

"Just talked?" Did Jim just scoot a little closer? What the hell was going on here? "Man, you're never going to get anywhere if that's all you do." 

"Who says I want to get anywhere? I told you I just wanted to keep it casual with her. Anyway, I'm not going to see her again." 

"What happened? Did you fight?" He was definitely closer. Blair pressed himself back a little bit, afraid to consider what might actually be happening. 

"No! Sandburg, listen to me...she and I just aren't as compatible as I thought. It was nothing big." 

"Mmmm. If you say so." That's it...maintain aloofness... 

"I do." Jim tipped his bottle and took a big drink. "How do you feel?" Another touch on Blair's arm...neurons and electrons firing rapidly and randomly... 

"I told you...I'm fine. Just glowing." Blair grinned, and pushed his hair back out of his eyes. "You?" 

"Never been better. Still glowing, too." Jim smiled back at Blair, and Blair felt his heart turn over. What was in that smile that wasn't usually there? 

"You know," Blair said casually, trying to pretend his heart wasn't suddenly racing, "This could be an interesting test we could try. See if--" 

"Chief." Very softly, right next to him. 

"Yeah?" Trying not sound hysterical. 

"Look at me a minute." Jim's voice was compelling, and Blair turned his head; shocked by what he saw shining in Jim's eyes. 

"Jim?" 

"Shhh. It's okay..." Jim's hands came up to cup Blair's face, and draw him closer. Blair closed his eyes; unable to accept what was happening, but unwilling to deny it. He felt his breath catch in his chest as Jim's warm--oh, so warm!--lips brushed across his once, twice...then returned to press against his more firmly. He opened his mouth under Jim's, allowing Jim's questing tongue entrance. His own returned the caresses it received, and he heard Jim groan low in his throat. It was his turn to moan when Jim pulled back ever so slightly, and ran his tongue over Blair's lips, then sucked that full lower lip into his mouth. Jim returned to his mouth over and over; plundering, taking possession. They pulled apart at last, driven by the need for oxygen. Blair raised a shaky hand to his mouth, which was now swollen from Jim's kisses. 

"What's going on...Jim?" 

"Do you have any idea how badly I've wanted to do that?" 

"No..." 

"A while now. I think I've been in denial...no, I *know* I've been in denial. You're a guy..." 

"So I've noticed." 

"Hush. I don't as a rule go for guys. But you've proved to be the exception to every other rule I've ever had...why not this one, too?" 

Blair shook his head. "Jim...what are you saying?" 

"I'm saying I love you, Chief." 

"You love me." 

"Is that so hard to believe?" 

"I don't want it to be..." 

"Then don't let it be. Let me show you, Blair. Let me love you." Jim shifted his body on the couch and drew Blair into an embrace. He nuzzled the younger man's neck, throat and ears...rimming the outer edge of Blair's ear before sucking the lobe into his mouth. Blair groaned with the sensation, and shifted in Jim's arms. 

"Jim...Are you sure?" 

Jim tilted Blair's face up to face his. "Yes. But I'll stop if it's not what you want." 

"Oh, God...I've wanted this for so long...almost since I met you..." Blair shuddered as he felt Jim's tongue began stroking down his throat--it felt like wet, hot velvet caressing him. "Man...oh, that feels good..." 

"Good. I plan on it getting progressively better." Jim moved his mouth to Blair's adam's apple, and sucked on it, swirling his tongue around the sensitive area. Blair gasped and jerked under his hands. 

"God, I don't know if I can handle better than this..." 

Jim chuckled. "Try, okay?" He pulled away from Blair's throat, and surveyed his partner. "You're over-dressed for the occasion, Sandburg. We're going to have to remedy that." Blair reached his hands up to undo the buttons on his shirt, and Jim batted them down gently. "None of that. I'll do it. First though, let's go upstairs. I want to do this right--not laying on the couch." 

Blair smiled at him; a seductive grin, full of promise, that made Jim's stomach clench into knots. "The couch has its merits too, lover. Don't sell it short." He stood up though, and stepped back to allow Jim to do the same. 

"Oh, I'm not," Jim assured him. "I'd like our first time to be in bed though." He held back though, and pulled Blair to him, pressed his mouth down against Blair's. Blair stretched his arms up around Jim's neck, and felt the bigger man's hand tangle into his hair as he held him close for a bruising kiss. Their mouths met over and over again; wet sounds of tongues tangling echoed in Jim's ears. Blair ground his pelvis against Jim's, and the motion brought their stiff cocks into contact with each other. The resultant sensation, even blanketed by several layers of cloth, brought both men up short, gasping for air. Blair lowered one arm, and dropped it between them, rubbing Jim's erection through his jeans. Jim growled low in his throat. "Trying to get me to change my mind about the couch, Chief?" 

"Who, me? Heaven forbid." Blair laughed, and rubbed harder; felt Jim arch against him. 

"Enough, Sandburg." Jim pulled away, and turned Blair around toward the stairs. "Go." He ran his hand down Blair's back as they walked, intending only to keep him moving, but the motion was a caress that invited another...and another... Blair stepped onto the first stair and turned, pulling Jim against him for another kiss. 

"You keep that up, and we won't make it upstairs," he whispered against Jim's mouth before thrusting his tongue in. He mimicked intercourse motions with his tongue in Jim's mouth, and felt the other man throb against him in response. When he pulled away, Jim's eyes were hot. "Want more?" 

"Yes," Jim growled. "Now." He turned Blair around once more, and pushed him gently up the steps.   
  


The brief trip allowed them a moment to get a measure of control back; although Blair couldn't have said if that was a good thing or not. He kind of enjoyed seeing Jim pushed so close to the edge. He shuddered at the thought of seeing him pushed *over* that edge... He shuddered again as Jim pulled him toward the bed. Jim sat down on the edge, and pulled Blair in between his legs. Blair stood there, looking down at Jim, wondering what he was thinking. It startled him when Jim spoke; he'd been staring at him so intently. 

"You." 

"What?" 

"I'm thinking about you, Chief." Jim reached up and began undoing the buttons on Blair's shirt. "You wondered what I was thinking about, right?" 

"Yes, but how--?" 

"I don't know." Jim shrugged, continuing on the buttons. "I know you didn't say anything...but I heard you." He finished the last button, and pushed the shirt off Blair's shoulders. He started on the jeans next. They were quickly dispatched, along with the boxers Blair favored. Blair shrugged the garments all the way off, then straightened up and stood there, displaying himself for Jim's view. Jim looked him up and down; the lithe, compact body, slightly tanned, with dark tan areolas and nipples; chest covered liberally with soft-looking dark brown hair that moved in a downward pattern, pointing towards Blair's cock--which jutted out proudly for Jim's inspection. 

Jim moved his hands up Blair's chest, enjoying the sensation of hair crinkling under his fingers. He found Blair's nipples, and began pulling on them gently, tugging with his fingertips. Blair gasped, and twitched. Jim pulled a little harder, and pinched lightly, and Blair moaned. 

"You like that?" Jim questioned, smiling. 

"Oh, yeah..." 

"How about this?" Jim pulled Blair down slightly, and sucked one little bud into his mouth; tongue swirling and teeth scraping. Blair groaned. "Yeah, I guess you do." He sucked and licked both nipples a little longer, enjoying the mewling cries Blair was making. He released Blair then, and continued on his downward exploration, feeling his way with tongue and fingers. The hair on Blair's stomach was sparser and slightly coarser than that on his chest; and the hair of his pubic bush was more coarse--wiry in texture. Jim nuzzled Blair's cock with his cheeks and chin, listening to Blair moan above him. Blair's scent was enough to make him hard anyway; here it was intoxicating--a combination of sweat, arousal, heat and Blair. He licked the palm of his hand, and wrapped it around Blair's cock; felt the younger man jump in response. Slowly, wanting to savor the moment, he began pumping Blair; increasing his speed slowly as Blair began thrusting against him. He looked up to see Blair with his head flung back, abandoning himself to the sensation. Jim grinned, and slid off the bed onto his knees. He released his hand hold on Blair's cock, replacing it with his mouth. Blair growled when he felt the moist heat of Jim's mouth encircle him. He reached down to grasp the other man's head, and hold it still; then began thrusting into Jim's mouth. Jim worked him with his tongue, sucking him in time to the thrusts. Blair began to thrust harder, fucking Jim's mouth. Jim relaxed and opened his mouth and throat as far as he could go to accommodate Blair, and increased his suction. He reached a hand around play with Blair's ass, and ran a finger down the cleft in his cheeks. Blair surprised him then by counterthrusting against that hand. Jim took the hint and pressed a finger into Blair's anus, working it back and forth in time to Blair's motion. With a gasp of surprise that didn't serve as much of a warning, Blair stiffened his body, and shot his load into Jim's mouth. The other man swallowed reflexively, then sat back on his heels, smiling. 

Blair stood above him, gasping for air, grasping for control. "God, you're good," he said in a incredulous tone. "I though you've never done that before." 

"No, I said as a rule I don't go for guys. I never said I hadn't done that before." 

"Ah. Well, you're good, man." 

"Thanks." Jim got off his knees, and slid his body up the length of Blair's. "I want to kiss you, baby. I want you to taste yourself." He lowered his mouth to Blair's, and stroked his tongue along Blair's. The younger man tasted his essence on Jim, and found it to be very erotic. He shivered in Jim's arms, and felt the other man echo the motion. Blair reached down to grasp Jim's cock. 

"I want to taste *you*," He told Jim. "Lay down." 

"Aye-aye, Chief." Jim laid down and scooted toward the center of the big bed. Blair knelt on the mattress next to him, trying to decide where to start. It was like being offered a huge banquet, and having to choose between all the offerings. He leaned down and licked Jim's throat, then nipped at it; felt the big man jump slightly under his hands. 

"Don't worry-I'm not a vampire," he whispered before he went back to work. 

"I...wasn't...ahh...w-worried!" Jim gasped out as he felt teeth closing gently over one nipple, and tugging slightly. A tongue followed, lapping at him, soothing away the sting Blair's teeth had caused. "God, Chief...you're trying to kill me, aren't you?" 

"Not at all...just want you to feel good." Blair practically purred at him. He resumed his tongue bath, followed occasionally by small nips with his teeth; some gentle, some not so gentle. Jim was writhing under him by the time Blair reached his cock. He licked the head, then blew cool air across it; felt Jim jerk under him, hips arching toward his mouth. Blair grinned up at Jim. He licked his way down one side of the straining shaft, then nibbled his way back up the other. Jim was moving his head back and forth against the pillow, moaning, his hips moving helplessly. Blair sucked Jim's cock into his mouth, and felt Jim surge in his mouth. This wasn't going to take long this way, and he wanted Jim to as close to the edge as possible before he took him over. His own rapidly hardening cock twitched at the thought of taking Jim; and he sat up. "Turn over." 

"Wha--?" Jim groaned the word, acutely aware of the loss of sensation. 

"Turn over. I want to taste all of you." 

"No, Chief. Later. Right now, I want you." 

"Oh yeah?" 

"Yeah. I want to take you...fuck you...make you mine." 

Blair's heart rate sped up with those words. He abandoned all thoughts of pushing Jim to the edge--apparently he was already there. His own cock throbbed at the thought of Jim filling him..."Yes..." 

"Now." 

"Yes." He shifted off of Jim. "Do you have...stuff?" 

"Yeah." Jim was already rummaging through his night table. "I bought them a while ago; I guess I was hoping this would happen." 

"Never hurts to plan ahead," Blair teased him gently. He leaned over and kissed Jim, slipping his tongue between Jim's lips. They exchanged a gentle kiss, then Jim pulled back. "I want you, Blair. I want to make love to you." 

Blair nodded and began to roll onto his stomach. Jim stopped him with a touch of his hand. "No...on your back. I want to look at you the first time we make love." Blair nodded again. He moved himself onto his back, and pulled his legs up toward himself. Jim squeezed some lube onto his fingers, and began stroking along the crease of Blair's ass. He moaned as felt one finger work it's way into him; followed by a second. Jim began thrusting gently with the two fingers, feeling Blair loosen up around him. He added a third finger, and felt as much as heard Blair's groan of pleasure. He thrust a little faster then, and Blair began pushing against him until he was fucking himself on Jim's fingers. Jim felt his self-control slipping away as he watched, and knew he had to be inside Blair. He pulled his fingers out abruptly, and Blair wailed with the loss. Jim grinned at him--a dark, seductive grin that made Blair's stomach turn over. Blair reached for one of the condoms and tore the package open. He watched Jim smooth a small amount of lube onto his cock, then hold his hand out for the condom. Blair shook his head, and sat up slightly, rolling the condom down Jim's length himself. He squeezed some more of the lube out, and smoothed it onto the latex sheath, then lay back. Jim knelt between Blair's legs, and lifted his hips slightly, pulling the smaller man toward him, so that Blair's hips rested on Jim's thighs. Jim positioned himself at Blair's entrance, and pushed forward. 

"Oh, God..." he groaned out loud as he pushed into his lover's body. Blair was so tight...so hot...his cock throbbed in the tight channel, begging for release. He heard Blair groaning in unison with him, and pushed further in. He went in slowly, giving Blair's body time to stretch around him, accommodate him. He wanted this to be as good as possible for both of them, and could only hope he'd be able to hold back. Then he was all the way in, pelvis resting against Blair's ass. He sat still for a moment, until Blair pushed restlessly against him. Hanging on to Blair's hips he began a slow in and out thrusting motion, gradually picking up speed. Blair began thrusting against him, panting for air as the speed and intensity increased. 

"Harder, Jim...I won't break...Fuck me, lover..." 

"Christ, Chief...oh, yeah..." 

"Harder!" Blair pushed his hips up against Jim, trying to slam their bodies together. "Oh, please...take me...faster, Jim...please..." Blair gasped the words out, "Fuck me, Jim...make me yours...mark me..." He looked up at Jim to see wild, hot eyes looking down at him. Jim growled. 

"You are mine...you'll always be mine." He slammed himself into Blair, feeling the motion reverberate all through his body. Jim stretched himself up, and leaned down to capture Blair's mouth in a bruising kiss that echoed what their bodies were doing. He thrust his tongue into Blair's mouth as he thrust his cock into Blair's body; felt the body under his shudder in response. Blair began arching against him, and he reached down to wrap his hand around Blair, pumping in time with their bodies' motions. He could feel his climax building; knew Blair's was coming too. The rush of fluids moving under his hand...speeding their way toward the surface...heat increasing and radiating outward... He broke the kiss, and began nibbling on Blair's neck, then paused and bit down, hard. 

"Ahhh....yes, lover!" Blair screamed as he came; thrusting his cock against Jim's hand, spurting all over Jim's hand and his own stomach. His muscles tightened up as he came, and contracted along Jim's cock. With a deep groan of defeat and pleasure Jim gave into the sensation and felt himself coming deep into Blair's body. 

Jim collapsed onto his side, rolling Blair with him. They lay together, still joined, for a few minutes while they caught their breath. Jim pulled his softened penis out of Blair's body, and discarded the condom. Then he pulled Blair into his embrace, stroking damp hair from a sweaty forehead. 

"Now do you believe me?" 

"What?" He'd never heard Blair sound so sleepy; so content, and suddenly felt the urge to strut around a bit. 

"Do you believe I love you?" He found himself staring into smokey blue eyes...eyes that were wide with unspoken emotion. 

"Yes...I do. I love you, too, Jim. I think I've always loved you." 

"Really?" This was news. 

"Yeah--almost from the minute I first saw you. You were trying so hard to be 'in control'--you have a real problem with that, you know? Anyway, you were standing there...you looked so vulnerable under that mask you had pasted on your face. I loved you then; the rest only made it stronger." 

"What about...Maya, and the others?" 

"I knew you didn't feel the same for me...didn't think you ever would. So I decided to try and find someone else." 

"Why not another man?" 

Blair shrugged as best he could, wrapped in Jim's arms. "I didn't want another man--I wanted you. Gender is like, so unimportant as far as I'm concerned. I've had male and female lovers both, man. It's whatever works at the time. I haven't had another man since I met you though--you were the best I could hope to have...anyone else would've fallen short." Blair paused for a moment, searching Jim's face. "It was like that with the women too. None of them measured up to the standards I'd set against you. No one measures up--just you." 

Jim held Blair's gaze. "Wow, Chief. That's a lot of expectation for one guy to meet." 

Blair shook his head. "No--don't you see? *You* don't have to meet the expectations...you *are* the expectations. No one *else* could meet them. I accept you for who and what you are--I don't want you to change to be anyone else. But no one else could be what you are to me. What you mean to me." His lips parted, tongue darting out to moisten them. Jim caught the gesture, and licked his own lips. 

"God, you're special, Blair." He lowered his head to kiss him. "I get what you're saying. There's no one else for you." 

"No, there isn't. There won't be. Only you." 

"I feel that way, too. We're connected...we have a bond between us." 

"Yeah--it's been there since the start. It's just gotten stronger. We belong with each other." 

Jim nodded, then snared Blair's gaze with his own again. Slowly, watching Blair's face all the while, he began running his hand down the length of his lover's body; felt the supple flesh begin to tense again. He watched those incredible eyes dilate, and grow hot; then turned Blair onto his back, telling him without words that they'd be together forever. Blair answered him without words, body arching against his...a reply that was silent, but not unspoken.   
  


* * *

  


Blair woke up sore and stiff, wondering what the hell had happened last night. As soon as he rolled over and made contact with the warm body next to his it all came back in a flash. *He loves me.* A smile curved his lips as he gazed at Jim. *I love him, and he loves me.* Jim looked very at peace when he slept; the lines around his eyes and mouth faded, that sensual mouth relaxed. And what that mouth could do... Blair's grin got even bigger, and he rolled toward Jim. He scooted as close as he could get, and brought his mouth level with Jim's, then brushed his lips across. He breathed "Morning, lover," against Jim's lips, then pulled back. 

It took Jim just a couple of seconds to come fully awake; stretching his long body, eyes blinking at the light in the room. "Morning to you, Chief. Sleep okay?" 

"Better than I have in months," Blair assured him. "How're your eyes? My glow is gone." 

"Yeah...mine too. The eyes are fine." He looked around, testing. "Everything looks clear." 

"It might be a good idea if we do some established tests later on today--make sure your sentinel abilities are okay." 

"Yeah--good idea. Hey, come here, would you? I haven't had a morning kiss yet." 

"Sure you have...what d'you think woke you up, big guy?" Blair teased him. 

"Well, it felt like it could have been a kiss, but then it stopped. I want a real kiss." Jim's voice dropped to a husky whisper that sent chills racing down Blair's spine. 

"You mean like this?" Blair swooped down on Jim with a hard kiss that Jim returned in like. Their tongues dueled in sweet battle, exchanging secrets about each other. Jim pulled away first, gasping for breath. 

"Yeah...like that." He shook his head. "You're incredible. Your mouth is incredible. I could get addicted to you." 

"I'm already addicted to you, man. You are so totally edible..." Blair ran his tongue across Jim's lips to illustrate his point, then continued further down, nipping at Jim's neck as he went. 

Jim groaned and shifted his head to the side, exposing more of his neck to Blair's lips, teeth and tongue. "I could get used to waking up this way," he ground out, as Blair's hand moved the sheets aside and wrapped around his straining erection. "Oh, yeah...oh, baby...feels so good..." Jim groaned again as Blair's teeth gently scored the tender skin behind his ear, tongue swirling around the ear lobe, lips sucking gently. Blair increased the speed of his hand, and soon Jim's hips were thrusting helplessly against him. He knew he was close when he felt the pit of his stomach spiraling; heat and ice creeping from his center, radiating outward. He tensed under Blair's hand, then gave a mighty thrust and came in long hot spurts all over his stomach. Blair continued to stroke him gently until the flood turned to a trickle, then stopped. Jim lay back against the pillow, feeling his heart race, and the blood pound in his veins. He closed his eyes for a minute, then jerked them open again as he felt a soft tongue sweeping across his abdomen. He looked down to see Blair licking at his stomach, cleaning him up. He licked down Jim's stomach toward his cock and balls, following the trail of fluid. Gently, tenderly, he bathed Jim's genitals with his tongue, slowly arousing him all over again. 

Blair looked up, momentarily distracted when he felt Jim's hand in his hair. He wasn't sure if he was being urged on, or encouraged to stop. Jim didn't look sure either. He had the strangest look on his face... 

"Jim? You okay, man?" 

"Yeah..." His voice was hoarse. 

"You sure? I can stop..." 

"No! Don't...stop. Whatever you do, don't stop..." Jim sounded like he was in a trance, almost. "Blair..." 

Blair went back to what he was doing, ignoring for the moment the ache in his own impossibly stiff cock. He was going to have the chance to push Jim to the edge...and wanted to savor every moment. He shifted his body lower, and settled in between Jim's legs. With a few gentle pushes he got Jim situated so that his legs were spread apart, knees bent slightly, feet flat on the bed. Jim shivered under his touch as he bent down and began to slowly trace an outline around Jim's balls with his tongue. He followed the path he'd begun with his tongue, going lower, then tracing back up again. He dipped lower still then; tongue gliding across the perineum, and felt Jim jerk underneath him. He grinned slightly and withdrew. "Turn over, lover." 

"Huh?" Jim looked like he was on the verge of a zone out. 

"Turn over. I'm going to taste all of you now." Blair moved from between Jim's legs, and helped his lover roll onto his stomach. Jim groaned as his now-raging cock pressed into the mattress; he began slowly undulating his hips, rubbing himself into it. 

"No, none of that now. Hold still, lover, you're gonna love this." 

"Why," came Jim's raspy voice, slightly muffled, "Does that worry me?" 

"'Cause you're *way* too uptight, Jim. You need to loosen up, man." Blair seated himself on Jim's ass, and dug his fingers into the other man's shoulders. Jim let loose with a groan that was halfway between pain and pleasure. Blair kneaded the tight muscles, feeling them tense and relax under his fingers. After several minutes of massage, Blair switched to his fingertips; traced them gently up and down the long sweep of Jim's back, caressing him. He followed with his tongue, beginning at Jim's shoulders, and working his way down, tasting every inch of Jim's glorious body. 

Jim moaned as he felt Blair's tongue caressing his back and his ass; the moan turned into a groan of rapture as he felt that tongue dip into the valley between his cheeks. It licked down one side, and up the other, pausing to venture further afield, caressing the smooth skin of his ass. Jim pressed his cock into the mattress, and prayed that he'd be able to stand this wonderful torture. He clenched the sheets in his fists, and tried to wiggle slightly. He felt Blair shift his legs further apart, and a questing finger traced a path from his balls up to his anus. The finger was removed then replaced, slightly moistened this time, and traced the same path. He shivered then as Blair blew a stream of air along that wet path, causing a rush of coolness. The finger was removed and moistened again, and began tracing its way up to his anus, then back down again. Jim felt himself clenching his cheeks, trying to will that finger to press into him. He heard Blair chuckle above him; felt a groan torn from his lips as the finger traced its path one more time. Then it was removed. He tensed his body, wondering when it would come again. He felt something warm and wet lick at the underside of his balls, and let out the breath he'd been holding in a great gasp. Blair's tongue... 

Blair licked slowly, taking great care not to miss any skin, moving his way upward. He traced the crack of Jim's ass, then paused to spread Jim open to his view. He could feel the other man tense under him as the cool air touched that very sensitive place. He gazed at the puckered opening, so inviting...then lowered his tongue and began licking a circle around it, slowly getting closer. Jim was groaning now, a hoarse whisper begging for release. Blair ignored him, and continued with his teasing. He moistened his mouth again, then blew a gust of air across Jim's anus; watched the muscles tighten under his hands. He lowered his head and licked across the opening, and Jim jerked like he'd been shot. "Oh...God...Blair...p-please..." Jim pleaded with him. Blair took the tip of his tongue and began running it around the edge of Jim's asshole, swirling it across the opening, teasing him. He edged the tip into Jim, then pulled out quickly when bigger man jerked his hips off the bed. He sat up, and caressed Jim's cheeks. 

"Please, what, lover?" 

"Oh...shit...take me, Blair...fuck me..." 

"You want me, Jim?" 

"Oh, God, yes...d-do I have to b-beg...?" Jim groaned as Blair worked one saliva-slicked finger into him, and began a rough thrusting motion. 

"No...I don't think so. Just making sure..." Blair rolled off of Jim's body, and grabbed the lube and a condom that were still on the nightstand. "Roll on your side, lover." He quickly sheathed himself and lubed the condom. His cock ached so badly, he was probably going to come as soon as he got inside Jim. He spooned up behind Jim, who'd maneuvered onto his side, and was partially propped up by pillows. Without any further preparation, Blair pushed the head of his cock into Jim's tight opening, groaning when he felt the bigger man squeezing around him. "Oh, God...Jim...you're so tight..." 

Jim groaned, a sound of pain mixed with pleasure. "Virgin territory, Chief..." Jim's voice was raspy, but strong. He pushed back against Blair, loving the feel of Blair's cock filling him. He'd never been on the receiving end like this before...Blair began rocking inside him, thrusting slowly. It was maddening. He needed more, needed it harder. He thrust back at Blair, grinding himself down on Blair's cock. "Fuck me, baby. Don't do it gentle... You got me hot for you, now take me." 

Blair felt a thrill race through him. He'd set this up, wanted to see what it would take to push Jim to the edge, and maybe over. Now he was being told to go rough...He buried his face in Jim's neck, and wrapped his hand around Jim's cock. He pumped him in time to his own hard thrusts; felt Jim's hand reach behind him to caress his ass. Jim came first; a smaller orgasm, since he'd come very recently, but the contraction of his muscles pressed down on Blair, who gave a shout of surprise, and came into him.   
  


They lay cuddled together afterward, exchanging soft, gentle kisses and caresses. Nothing that sought to arouse; only to assure. Both men were spent; both from the physical experience and from the emotions that had been attached. Jim curled his body around Blair and reflected on the last 24 hours. He'd gone from having a friend and partner to having a lover and a partner. It was a heady sensation; one he was determined to enjoy for as long as possible. He was drifting half asleep, thinking along these lines, when Blair's voice brought him back to the present. 

"Hey, Jim...?" 

"Yeah, Chief?" 

"Did you mean what you said about virgin territory? I thought you said you'd done this before." 

Jim sighed. "I've given and received blow-jobs, but that's about the extent of it. And that was twenty, twenty-five years ago...boys playing around in the locker room after practice." 

"Like a circle jerk." 

"Exactly. We'd do that sometimes, too." 

"How'd you know what you were doing last night then? If you'd never done it with a guy before?" 

"The mechanics aren't that much different, Chief. Just the parts." Jim grinned at Blair, who made a face at him. "Why? How often have you done it? That was a mind-bending experience, just now." 

"Suffice it to say, often enough...though not excessively. I've had enough practice to know what I'm doing...but I'm not a slut." Blair had mild reproach in his voice. 

"I wasn't trying to imply that you were." Jim hastened to assure him. "Just that you seemed to know what you were doing...and it felt good. Really good." 

"Oh. Thanks, man." 

"No sweat, Chief. Up to another round?" Jim slid a hand down Blair's body, eliciting a groan from the younger man. 

"I don't think so...not until I've replenished body fluids, at least. I feel pretty dehydrated, right now." 

"Want to get up then?" 

"Yeah...I'm getting hungry, too. For food," he added, when Jim zeroed in on his neck and ear. 

"You're no fun, Sandburg." 

"Well, that's the breaks, man. One of us has to be, you know, responsible. We can't boff like bunnies all the time." 

"'Boff like bunnies'?" Jim repeated, trying not to laugh. 

"Expression I've heard on campus. You know what I mean." Blair was having trouble keeping his face straight, too. "Come on, old man. Let's get up." He squeezed Jim's thigh and climbed out of bed. 

Jim followed suit, coming around to take Blair in his arms. "Have I told you this morning I love you?" 

"No..." Blair looked up at Jim, emotion shining in his eyes. "You haven't." 

"Then let me tell you, Blair. I love you." Jim cupped Blair's face in his hands and kissed him gently. "I adore you." Kiss. "I want you." Kiss. "I need you." Kiss. "I'm going to love you forever." Kiss. 

Blair pulled Jim's lips back down to his after the last kiss, and breathed across them, "I love you too, Jim. Forever." He pressed his lips to Jim's, then pulled away. "Now, feed me." 

Jim rolled his eyes. "You're so romantic, Chief." 

Blair laughed. "Hey, like I said before, man...one of us has to be responsible!"   
  


* * *

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